A Second Chance
by I. G. Scorsone
Summary: It wasn't love at first sight. They didn't lock eyes and then, everything was right. They had to push through layers of darkness and insecurity to come up for fresh air. It wasn't love at first sight, but it was real. And maybe, just maybe, this time she would make all the right choices.
1. Chapter 1

It wasn't love at first sight. They didn't lock eyes and then everything was right. They had to push through layers of darkness and insecurity to come up for fresh air. It wasn't love at first sight, but it was real.

And maybe, just maybe, this time she would make all the right choices.

Amelia Shepherd had had her fair share of love stories, all of which had ended up in flames. It was mostly because of her, because she walked out even when the passion was still high. Well, with a few exceptions.

But this, this was different.

The only problem with it being different was that she couldn't quite place it in any ordinary margins. After all, what were they?

Amelia was squinting her mind for anything she may have missed, all the way to the elevator.

"Wow, easy there." Meredith, who was already on, joked as she watched her sister-in-law absentmindedly greet her. "Might bump into someone."

"Funny." Amelia answered, her ears tuning back to the real world.

"Care to share what had you so absorbed?" She asked, leaning on the elevator wall.

Amelia knew this tactic, it was deflecting the attention from herself and onto someone else.

But truthfully, she had know problem going along with it.

"Nothing that can't be fixed. Have you talked to Pierce lately?"

Amelia couldn't pinpoint exactly when she had started to care so deeply for Meredith's sister but ever since the latter had dragged them both onto the dance floor, they had started something.

In all fairness, it felt like family, something Amelia wasn't quite used to.

"Yeah, she's fine. Or, well, better. I just can't help this sick feeling that this is only the beginning."

It was a joke, and both women laughed. The idea that they were all doomed had crossed everyone's mind more than once.

After all, what kind of hospital lost so many doctors?

The elevator bell rang, just as the doors opened to reveal a familiar figure.

"Ugh, hey." Owen greeted, slightly taken aback. So many years and this elevator seemed to always get exactly what it wanted.

Amelia wasn't a foreigner to the magic of the elevator either, although the L.A. one was slightly less pushy.

"Hey to you, too." Meredith replied. She sure was in a bubbly mood today.

And then, then there was silence, enough to suffocate everyone in that freaking elevator.

By the time the doors finally opened, the three rushed out in different directions.

Amelia had to settle her heart before going into surgery, knowing that she couldn't afford thinking about anything else but a brain.

Her back was sore.

Oh, and her shoulders hurt.

And her neck.

The surgery had been no problem. The surgery had been easy. The problem was the patient and her endless complains.

 _Dr Shepherd I think I can't feel my toes. Ah, never mind._

 _Dr Shepherd, I think I'm going to be sick. Oh no, it passed._

 _Dr Shepherd_

 _Dr Shepherd_

 _Dr Shepherd_

By the twentieth Dr Shepherd, Amelia just called her interns and left them with the useless complainants. She had no problem with aftermath sickness. She knew it sometimes happened and it was fine, she always tried her best for the patient to be absolutely fine.

Her problem, though, was with fake alarms.

The elevator doors were almost closing when Owen hurried inside.

"Hey." He greeted, the surprise shown on his face.

 _Thank you, elevator._

"Hi." Amelia answered, searching his eyes for a brief second.

"So, Meredith is really selling her house than?"

It wasn't much and they both knew the answer to the question. But it was a start.

"Yeah, I really didn't believe it at first. But she put a sign, and most things are already in boxes here and there."

"It can't be a nice sight."

"It's not." Amelia admitted. It was depressing and sometimes it even ached too badly. It wasn't a house to her, it wasn't a house to Meredith. But it was a symbol of moving on.

"If you want, I'm always at the trailer. Well, as long as I'm not forced to leave." He chuckled lightly, his whole face a shadow of a laugh.

 _Yes, there_. Amelia thought. Just a few steps away and yet, seemingly always out of reach.

She nodded.

"Did you find anything yet?"

The elevator had long ago reached the final destination and without either's notice, they kept walking.

It was like a reflex, almost. Like this happened every day.

"A few places. But nothing actually worth it."

Amelia thought about it for a second, but the words flew out of her mouth before she had time to change her mind.

"I could help you. I mean if you want to-"

The spell was broken, and Owen turned to her in surprise. He got lost in her piercing blue eyes for a second.

"You don't-" but he stopped, seemingly to think it through. "Actually, yeah. That would be great. If you want to."

Amelia nodded, her eyes still fixed on his.

"Sure. When and where?"

"The next visit's tomorrow afternoon, if you're not on call or busy." He was giving her an out and maybe ten months earlier, she would have taken it. But she she was suddenly so tired of running.

"It sounds fine."

They talked about it. He gave her the details and she agreed to come.

What was going to happen, she didn't know. It still didn't stop that strange urge to hope.

How much she hated that urge.

 **So, how was it?**

 **I'm still getting to know Owen and Amelia so please excuse any OOCness.**

 **Any feedback, positive or negative, is very much appreciated!**


	2. Chapter 2

Amelia was slightly desperately trying to find something to wear.

She wasn't kidding herself, he had seen her naked multiple times. She didn't expect some form of amazing reaction.

But she wanted _something_.

When she got dressed to go on dates before, she always knew exactly what to wear. Something hot.

That cut through everything. Something hot and you were covered for the whole night. If you were lucky enough, he wouldn't even take his eyes off you.

The thing was, this, whatever this was, was not a date. Probably.

And her usual answer to that would still be something hot. Only problem, she was going house hunting.

What kind of desperate person went all hot to walk through an empty apartment and criticize it?

Nope, just hot wasn't going to cut it.

She was so absorbed in trying to find something, she didn't even notice Meredith standing at the door.

The latter cleared her throat in an effort to make herself visible.

Amelia turned around swiftly, the pony tale slapping her cheek in the process.

"Hey."

She greeted, as nicely as possible.

She annoyed and running out of time but she and Meredith were just barely on a good note and she wasn't going to risk ruining it.

At the same time, she _really_ needed more time.

 _"_ It looks like a hurricane had gone through here _."_ Meredith said, and she was not wrong.

There were clothes. A lot of them.

And the bed sheets were tangled, the drawers were opened and the closed air was adding to the effect of chaos.

Amelia was ready to say some smart remark before she fully registered the words.

 _Hurricane_.

Yeah, she was a hurricane.

"I'll clean this up, later. How are the kids?"

If Meredith noticed the change of subject, she said nothing.

"They're fine. Ellie is finally sleeping, which is nothing short of a miracle." Amelia studied the frame in her doorframe. Meredith's shoulders were pressed with tiredness, her eyes were barely visible from the bags underneath them and her hair was a mess.

Not to mention the food patterned blouse she was wearing. All the kids' menus were on that blouse.

Suddenly, Amelia felt the guilt overwhelm her. These were Derek's kids as well. And just because Derek wasn't here to help anymore, she still should.

"...and Zola's out for ballet recital."

She hadn't heard the whole story but it was enough to see the helplessness pressing on her sister-in-law. She knew Meredith could take it, take almost anything and still survive. But even the strongest needed a break.

"I can take Bailey with me." The words flew out of Amelia's mouth before she could truly register.

 _Flitter. You need a damn flitter_.

"You can?" The way Meredith's eyes lit up when she heard, made Amelia feel ten times worse for regretting it.

Why was she so mad about it, anyway? It wasn't a date and she knew Bailey. She could handle Bailey.

"I mean I know you have- actually, I don't know what you have..."

 _You and me both_ , thought the brunette slightly bitterly.

"but I can call Maggie or Callie or... You really don't have to do this."

"It's fine. It's nothing too important, anyway."

Oh, she hoped Owen liked Bailey as much as she did, because if not, there was going to be a problem.

* * *

She had chosen a see-through blouse and some random jeans.

She hoped it was okay. Having a toddler walking side by side with her wasn't exactly the turn on she wanted to achieve.

But she was going to have to manage.

The street was fairly quiet, not that it mattered, and it seemed like the kind of neighborhood where people just went on with their own business.

Which would've been good.

Only it was so far away from Meredith's old place. She knew it was selfish to even want him to be closer, but she couldn't exactly help it.

Suddenly, she felt someone tugging on her pants. She looked down to see Bailey's small fists trying to get her attention.

"I'm sleep." He said.

Well, either he wanted sleep or he was tired, but either way, Amelia swooped him up in her arms, securing his small hands around her neck.

"Are you hungry as well?"

She was relieved when he shook his head.

* * *

Number 2247.

Because of course, it was such a long street.

By the time she had reached the right house, she was entirely sure any shadow of sexiness was gone, erased by sweat and a sleeping baby in her arms.

Not even baby, anymore.

Suddenly she felt the need to run, run away and invent some miraculous surgery she had to preform last minute.

Hell, she was even going to preform one if it was going to give her enough motive to walk away now.

Not even the damn elevator was moving properly.

She had been waiting for forever, before the doors finally opened.

She stepped in, pressed two, and tried to wake the sleeping child in her arms.

"Bailey. Hey, wake up. We're here."

"House?" He asked, while rubbing his eyes with his miniature fingers.

Amelia smiled.

"No, not home. But this could be someone's new home."

"It could?"

"Sure it could. Every house needs someone to live in it."

Just as she was slowly putting Bailey down, she noticed a very familiar figure get in the elevator.

The doors closed behind Owen Hunt.

What was it with elevators?!

"Hey." He smiled at first. Then he took her in, and she knew suddenly her goal had been achieved, even if in a small proportion.

But just as his eyes roomed over her, they suddenly stopped at knee level, to the toddler hugging her left leg.

"I'm sorry."

No 'hi'. No 'good to see you'. No 'how have you been'.

 _Nothing_.

Words just flew out of her no matter where she was.

"Meredith was really tired, and I felt like I owed her so... It kinda happened. I really am-"

He cut her off with a smile.

A smile that made her stomach twist with a feeling unknown to her. It was the smile a man threw at the woman he loved.

"It's fine." It was gone in an instant, but that smile got imprinted in her mind. Now, he was chuckling.

Now, he was talking to Bailey as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

And that smile, that most miraculous smile, had been replace by one of pure joy.

He loved kids, she had seen it multiple times and at that moment, she couldn't even remember the reason she had been so terrified.

By the time the elevator doors finally opened again, they were lost in this world where words didn't mean anything.

Sadly enough, this world was fantasy.

"Good afternoon."

He was a guy. A really thin guy. And he might have been an inch shorter than Amelia. And the huge-framed glasses surely did not help his skinny face.

In fact, out of the three guests, only Bailey could've looked normal while walking down the street with that man by his side.

Owen looked like a giant and the sight of Amelia with him would've been just plain funny.

In fact, it already was.

She looked at Owen discreetly, to see if he was thinking the same, only to lock eyes.

She saw the hint of a laugh as she tried to hide hers.

"If you could follow me, please?"

And so, the tour begin.

* * *

It was a kinda small apartment.

She didn't like it, not that it was her choice to make.

It wasn't even about the smallness of it. But the rooms were closed, there were only a few windows and the fancy furniture was nothing but old rugs and destroyed couches.

No, she definitely didn't like it here.

Owen seemed to share her opinion, because he was no longer paying any attention to the poor man in front of him.

"Thank you." Amelia intervened, smiling politely. It's a very nice place.

"And it's perfect for a family!" The man tried one last time.

At first, she didn't get it.

It took her a while to understand what the man meant by that, and when she did, she couldn't find a fast enough way to hide her reddening cheeks.

 _Damn you_.

Beside her, she felt Owen shift uncomfortably.

"Well, thank you, again. We'll go now." He said, trying to get out of there.

It only took for the elevator doors to close for the both of them to burst out laughing.

"Why arr you 'aughin'?" Bailey asked, his wish to laugh as well obvious on his small face.

But _why_ were they laughing?

What was so funny that they just couldn't help themselves?

Amelia tried her best to find an answer for Bailey but she couldn't even give herself one. It just felt natural to be happy when he was around.

It was, in fact, intoxicating.

"Because that man thought we were your mammy and daddy."

Bailey nodded, but Amelia knew he didn't understand.

* * *

"I never asked you, where will you live when Meredith sells?" They were walking along the long street.

As ungrateful as Amelia had been a few hours earlier, she was infinitely grateful now.

"At Meredith's old place. Karev's selling it back to her and moving out." She didn't mention Maggie was going to be there as well.

In fact, she wasn't sure why she hadn't.

"Everyone seems to be moving." Owen said, his face painted with something new.

Amelia thought about asking, before deciding against. Whatever he had to tell her, he was going to tell her.

She hoped, he was going to tell her.

"Life's moving on." She said, a mockery of a smile on her lips.

How long until this was going to burst into flames and burn her?

 **Liked it? Not so much? Hated it? Loved me?**

 **Tell me what you thought!**


	3. Chapter 3

"That was tough." Amelia said, jokingly  
She had been stuck in an elevator with Mr. and Mrs. Not My Fault.  
Also known as Kepner and Avery.  
Amelia knew the story. She enrolled in the army and he was alone for nine months. Then she wanted to go back and he said she either did and lost him or didn't and would save their marriage.  
What neither had discussed was the idea that Kepner might go to the airport and not get on the plane, that she might hang back.  
So, Amelia was forced to listen to an endless discussion about this, for ten whole minutes as the power had briefly cut off.  
Now, though, Avery was throwing her a murderous glare.  
"I meant it as a joke." She said, apologetically. As much fun as she made of their problems, she felt sorry for them. They weren't the perfect match, one could tell that from ten miles away and in a few seconds, but they had love.  
And she knew that, at least for everyone else apparently, it worked out.  
The thought gave her a strange feeling of missing her L.A. people.  
For a second, she considered calling Addison later, just to check in.  
"I know, sorry." Avery mumbled, obviously wanting some peace and quiet.  
Unfortunately for him, Amelia wasn't known for keeping silent.  
"She doesn't see it, you know? It's not that she doesn't care or anything. She just doesn't understand. But if you give her a little more time..."  
"Yeah, well maybe I'm tired of being the one who keeps giving."  
The bell rang and the elevator doors opened widely to let him walk out as fast as he could.  
Sighing to herself, Amelia got off as well. The two reminded her slightly of Charlotte and Coop.  
Just a little.  
What was with all this nostalgia falling over her?  
She was planning on seeing who was free at the moment but she ended up staring at the board for a moment, lost in thought. All the names, the surgeries, everything written on there. Everything was going to be erased sooner or later, a sponge that would decide who's next.  
Like the universe really.  
This really, really sick universe.  
"Amelia?"  
Amelia turned around at her name being called only to bump into a hard mass.  
She stumbled, taking a few steps backwards only to look back up.  
"What's wrong?" There was concern written all over Owen's face.  
She tried to hide her own dizziness.  
"Nothing." Amelia answered, out of reflex more than anything else.  
But when she looked back at Owen, she suddenly knew she wasn't going to fool him.  
Still, what was there to tell?  
"I mean it." She finally said, her words more sure than how she felt.  
Nothing is wrong, she repeated in her mind, hoping it will become true if she said it enough times.  
She just had this feeling, all of a sudden.  
This uncontrollable, inexplicable, unsettling feeling that something was going to go terribly wrong.  
But she still looked at Owen and smiled.  
"Any idea why the power got cut?"  
"Minor repairs in the basement." He answered, as they settled in a nice pace side by side.  
As it would seem, they were both free for lunch.

"I found another apartment. It's actually really close to the hospital." Owen started, the food at their table long ago eaten.  
"Where?" Amelia took a gulp of water.  
"A few blocks from here. I was planning on going after my shift was over."  
It was an invitation. Or at least, Amelia hoped it was an invitation. She had been so out of her game with him, she wasn't sure she'd seen an invitation if it took the form of a bleeding brain.  
"Can I join you in your expedition?"  
Making jokes. That was the way.  
He laughed lightly, his shoulders shaking for a brief moment before nodding.  
"Sure."  
It was a moment's peace. But not long after, there was screaming.  
The whole cafeteria seemed to be looking in the direction of Meredith and Maggie arguing.  
Amelia was just about to walk to them, but froze completely when she saw both approaching her table.  
She gave Owen a look that mocked quite perfectly absolute terror.  
She hadn't known either long but she knew when they fought, with anyone really, it wasn't going to end well.  
The two sat down on either side of Amelia, completely trapping her.  
"What happened." She looked laid-back. She talked laid-back.  
But she was scared as hell of the answer. What more could happen?  
"I was in the OR when the power got cut off. And you know what I had to do because my patient was dying? Operate on a beating heart without any indication of what was going to happen. No beeping. No SATs. Nothing.  
Half the nurses were terrified of what I was doing and the other half had run off to a corner. It was the absolute nightmare. So I did a surgery on my own, because I had no idea why nothing was working and why we weren't on a generator. I'm lucky the patient didn't wake up."  
Amelia watched Maggie ramble on, imagining the actual situation, without the constant exaggeration.  
"Ok. But why are you pissed at Meredith?" She finally asked, entirely sure that the story would end with 'my patient was dead for 5 minutes and I had to do CPR on a heart' or anything that resembled it.  
"Because she didn't bother to tell me!"  
"I swear, Maggie. I just forgot." Meredith explained, in her calm, composed voice.  
Amelia was entirely sure that had it been her mad, she would've murdered Meredith only for that flat answer.  
How in the world that woman still had it all together was a mystery beyond her.  
"Ok, chill. Patient survived, everyone's fine and hopefully there will be no more unexpected power cuts to warn anyone about. Now, eat." Amelia tried.  
She hadn't notice Owen get up, but she couldn't blame him for it. It was hell whenever two of them fought and Amelia was waiting warily for the day the three of them had an argument and each was on another side.  
Surely enough, the apocalypse could come after that.  
The silence that had just set was interrupted by Karev joining them.  
"Has anyone seen Jo?"  
The female population of the table shook their heads.  
"Why?" Meredith asked, her shoulders tense.  
"Had a fight. And the last time she was pissed at me, she bought us a crime scene." He took a huge bit of a sandwich, and looked down at apparently nothing.  
He was worried.  
Amelia tried to recall running into Wilson during the morning, but everything else except the elevator fight was blurry.  
A false alarm at one time, an aneurysm at another. Basic things that left her mind wandering for excitement.  
"Think I saw her go home a few hours ago." Maggie said. "Although I wouldn't guarantee. It could've just as well been a dancing lizard and I wouldn't have seen the difference because someone had forced me into a really, really, really dangerous surgery that could've also gotten the hospital sued had it not gone my way."  
And the peace was over.  
By the time Callie had also joined the table, everyone was in a heated argument.  
"It depends on the situation." Meredith accentuated every word, making sure the message was clear.  
"Okay, but if you know nothing. You just get a patient and you know he has both a brain bleed and has had a heart attack. What do you do first?"  
"Brain. Even if you save his heart, he'll be a vegetable." Amelia answered, approximately at the same time as Maggie.  
"Heart. You want him alive to work on his brain, don't you?"  
"Okay, this could literary never happen. You'd need a head CT to know about the brain bleed and at least a member of the family to tell you about the history of heart attacks. We're talking about a critical patient rushed straight to the OR." Callie said, her fork playing with the food.  
"Yeah, but what if it's a kid. He can't tell you what hurts. He can't explain most things. Do you take a risk and operate on his brain or heart?"  
"I still don't see why you can't do both?" Meredith asked, to which everyone else agreed.  
This conversation was pointless. But Amelia found herself enjoying every minute of it.

She found Owen later, writing on the board.  
"You do know no longer being chief also means you don't have to watch over everyone else." Amelia approached him.  
She watched as he shook his head in amusement.  
"Funny." He answered, turning to face her. "Slow day?"  
"Don't remind me! Where are all the people with brain bleeds!"  
"You know, it might just be good for you."  
"I highly doubt that." Although Amelia knew he was right, she wasn't about to give it to him.  
"By the way," He started, as they made their way to the elevator. "What was that with Pierce and Meredith?"  
She shook her head, the fight forgotten for a moment. "Nothing unsolvable. Although everyone seems on their edge today."  
She didn't like to admit this, but the feeling was nagging at her.  
"Didn't notice. Hey, talk later? I have some paper work that still needs to be done."  
Amelia laughed at him, but nodded.  
"So you abandoned the benefits of the job but are still stuck with the drawbacks?" She teased him.  
He threw her a mocking smile, as he walked away.  
Amelia, tired of waiting for the elevator, made her way down the stairs. It seemed to calm her unexplainable nerves, the rhythmic movement of her legs on each step. Despite that, it wasn't until she was out the hospital door and being hugged by the chilly Seattle air that she felt completely at ease.  
She tried to put two and two together, see if she was missing something but there seemed nothing to be found. All she knew was that people weren't usually all in such a bad mood, at the same time.  
She turned around, to look at the hospital. She took the building in, every window, every glass door.  
It took her a second to realize she could also draw a map of what was inside.  
Every single corner, every on-call room, the chapel, the roof, the ORs. Everything.  
The coolness was becoming slightly uncomfortable, so she took a few steps towards the imposing building.  
Suddenly, there was a strong gush of wind that blew, making her stumble backwards. At first, she thought she was imaging things.  
But just as she was about to take another step, she watched one side of the hospital burst into millions of pieces, small and big, as it if was a toy that could so be easily shattered.  
She stood there, feet glued to the pavement as the east wing stared her in the face, ablaze.  
She thought she could hear herself yelling something. It resembled a prolonged 'no'. It resembled pain and fear.  
But to her, she was frozen in place, stuck to the ground.  
She watch with blank eyes as a second explosion bursted out of no where. Or was it that her eyes were too full of tears to see clear enough?  
She felt the ground shake beneath her but wasn't sure it was truly happening.

 **Do you hate me?**  
 **I hope not. I need you all to know I am not Shonda and therefore do not rip hearts out for pleasure. That being said, I hope you still enjoyed!**  
 **And to** ** _fab_** **, I wrote the paragraph, I'm glad you liked it 3**


	4. Chapter 4

Amelia was running frantically.  
It had taken her a moment more to unglue herself from whatever shock was holding her back. And then she was running straight through the hospital doors and searching.  
She had bumped into Avery at first.  
"April?" He asked, the terror on his face mirroring Amelia's. She shook her head.  
"Owen?" Avery's eyes spoke for themselves.  
 _No_.  
She ran into Karev next.  
"I am begging you tell me you've seen Meredith."  
Amelia closed her eyes in pain, as she shook her head.  
"Owen? Maggie?" She asked, desperation dripping from every name she spoke.  
"Maggie's fine. Some scratches but fine. She was searching for others. I don't know where Hunt is."  
Amelia nodded, understanding. "What about Jo?"  
"She's home. With Edwards."  
 _Thank you, universe for that_.  
"Have you tried the fifth floor?" She asked.  
Karev shook his head.  
"No, why?"  
"Meredith had a patient she wanted to check there."  
"Ok. I'll go take a look. I'll tell you if I find her."  
Amelia could only nod, her brain already somewhere else. The attending's lounge was on the east side.  
How she wished her brain was wired to his right now.  
 _Every man I ever loved has died._  
 _Every man I ever loved has died._  
No, she couldn't think this. Not yet, not now.  
The mass of people was heading in the opposite direction and Amelia had to push through to get to that damn elevator. It wasn't until she actually reached the place where she had been only a few minutes earlier that she gave a slight scream.  
The elevator doors were wide open, leaving nothingness in the place where the cabin was supposed to be.  
It looked like a black hole, something that had swallowed lives merciless, as if they were unimportant for the planet. She felt her whole body shake, as she fought her way closer to the universe's crime scene.  
She didn't know what she expected to see when she looked down but it wasn't that.  
It looked like the elevator was perfectly functional, could've gone back up any moment now. The huge tin box looked unharmed. Amelia could only imagine if people were stuck there.  
She tried not to, as what was actually happening down there could be to terrible to even comprehend Her phone beeped, giving her the perfect opportunity to forget.  
 _Not on 5th floor. I'll keep searching_.  
She was reading and walking, that's what she was doing so she could bump into someone.  
When she looked up, she didn't recognize the person. Her face was half scratched with what could only be glass shards, as was her whole left arm. One of her eyes was turning purple, barely opened anyway and the other was shedding tears uncontrollably.  
Amelia needed to take a step back to recognize the form.  
"Oh, God. Maggie!"  
It was all the words that could be formed in her mouth.  
"I'm fine. Actually, I'm not. I'll probably have scars for the rest of my life, as if I didn't already not catch an eye but that's beyond the point. Meredith!"  
"What? What's with her?" Maggie was talking so fast, it felt impossible to keep up.  
"She's down there! Stuck! There's this beam on her torso that I couldn't lift! She needs help, right now! Oh God, this is so horrible. This is.."  
But Amelia wasn't listening anymore. She texted Karev, knowing fully well he wanted to help as well as they needed some brute strength.  
How hard could this thing be?  
She looked around, trying to find some familiar faces, but the crowds were impossible to single out. She stood for a few minutes, before she noticed a fanatic figure yelling words left and right, half of encouragement, half commands.  
Only few, however listened, the older nurses or the more experienced doctors.  
"April!" Amelia yelled after her, trying to catch her attention.  
The red haired woman stopped for a second to look around, before abandoning any tasks.  
"Tell me you've seen Jackson."  
Amelia nodded. "He's fine, perfectly fine. But-"  
"Where's Owen?" She asked, looking behind Amelia as if expecting him to jump out and yell ' _gotha_ '.  
Amelia looked down, for a moment trying to find the strength to shake her head again.  
"I don't know. But Meredith is stuck under some _thing_ and we need as many hands as possible."  
Alex came merely seconds later.  
"Where is she?"  
It was Maggie who led the way, between the fallen bits and pieces, over the broken glass and through the endless hallways that now looked apocalyptic. With every step, the walls were even more destroyed, as if they were walking straight into death's arms.  
Maybe they were.  
Amelia felt the heaviness press onto her, the fear for her sister, the fear for Owen. It felt overwhelming only to imagine.  
The moment they reached their destination, Amelia was completely horrified.  
It didn't look like the east wing anymore. Instead, there was a huge whole where that part used to be, as if someone had cut if off. The wind was blowing from the opening, creating deafening sounds as it hit metal.  
There was nothing still intact there.  
Meredith was a few feet away from the cliff, breathing too heavily and too slowly.  
Amelia rushed at her side.  
"Hey, we've got you." She said, refusing the uncontrollable shake that wanted to cover her composed voice.  
Seconds later, everyone but Maggie was struggling with that stupid beam.  
At first, it wouldn't move and for a second, Amelia actually thought they didn't have enough strength. Not even combined. She found herself childishly wishing she had gone to the gym more.  
Then, it moved a little.  
And then, then miraculously, they managed to lift it up just enough for Maggie to get Meredith out from underneath. The beam fell back immediately, with a loud thud.  
Meredith coughed blood, moment in which Amelia knew they had to operate on her precisely at that moment.  
"All the ORs are empty. I'll get her in one." April said, trying to lift Meredith up.  
"No wait. I'll come with you." And she was scooped up in Karev's arms, as he carried her effortlessly out from that place.  
The two left watched as their friends walked away, before finally getting back down on earth.  
"You should get checked up, as well." Amelia suggested, but Maggie just shook her head.  
"I'm fine, they're scratches. Nothing fatal."  
But Amelia had her mind somewhere else as well.  
"Have you seen Owen?"  
Another shake of a head, and she knew she couldn't take anymore.  
"I saw Callie sometime ago, but that was all."  
"Have you seen Richard?" Amelia mimicked the gesture.  
"We should..."  
"Yeah."  
And they went their separate ways, each trying to find one person, only one.  
 _Damn you, universe._  
Damn you.

* * *

It took her by complete surprise when she ran into Torres.  
"Have you seen Owen?"  
"Yes! Oh, yes. Yes, yes. Yes. Thank you, yes."  
Amelia expected another no, but even if she had been expecting a yes, she surely didn't think of these many.  
"You need to go, now. He's in OR 2."  
Amelia's knees felt like made out of jelly. What had happened?  
Callie seemed to guess her questions, because she didn't wait for them to be verbally expressed.  
"He has a brain bleed. Well, 90% sure he has a brain bleed. And there wasn't one freaking neurosurgeon we could find."  
But Amelia was shaking.  
She was shaking uncontrollably, trying to regain control. It couldn't be. No, no it couldn't happen. Not like this.  
She tried to hold herself together.  
It was up to her, if Torres was right. Up to her, and her alone.  
She had his whole life in her hands, and any mistake she'd make would result in his death. She knew it, she just knew.  
"Amelia?" Callie asked.  
"Just, just give me a minute." She raised her palm as a sign, and she stopped to catch her breath.  
She was Amelia Shepherd.  
She was a neurosurgeon.  
She was a freaking superhero.  
She couldn't save her brother. She couldn't save Mark. She couldn't save her baby, Ryan, Michelle.  
But she could save _him_.  
She could and she was going to.  
When the doors of that OR opened to reveal Owen's body laying still on the table, only his chest rising and falling, she knew she could do it.

 **Muahahahahahaha!**

 **Yeah, okay, I'm not an evil person, I swear!**

 **Hope you liked this chapter, and Amelia's mad rush to find Owen.**


	5. Chapter 5

There had been 157 deaths.  
123 gravely injured.  
24 barely hurt.  
5 people in a coma.  
A total of 309 people directly affected by the explosion.  
It had been a gas leak or something like that, although Amelia wasn't interested in the why.  
309 people.  
5 comas.  
And it was one, only one whom she cared about and he just absolutely _refused_ to wake up.  
He hadn't singed anything.  
He could be resuscitated as many times as the doctors wanted.  
Amelia had to three times.  
Three times when she though her whole world was going to fall apart. Three times when someone up there decided to make fun of her and create the perfect disaster for her.  
But each time his heart started again.  
He had had a brain bleed, indeed.  
Some swelling, but nothing Amelia couldn't handle. She had done the job flawlessly.  
And yet, he still wasn't awake.  
It was day 5.  
Two more days and his chances of waking up would drop drastically.  
If he went over 30 days, he had to be moved from the hospital.  
25 more days and he had to be moved, his chances dropping once again.  
Amelia had gone through all the statistics.  
All the miracle cases.  
Every single unpredictable, unprecedented, extraordinary wake, Amelia had read them all.  
She had to pass his room everyday on her way to the OR. She passed his room everyday on the way back, on the way home, on the way to the cafeteria.  
It didn't matter where she was going, she always passed his room.  
People talked.  
Doctors and nurses and interns and residents.  
She heard all kinds of speculations, and every time the story got even wilder than the last. By now, she had probably been engaged with him since... _birth_.  
Every now and then, she would snap at someone when she heard the rumors, tell them to mind their own business. But she knew damn well people were not merciful, they didn't see someone grieving and immediately thought about the things they could do to help.  
At first, everyone pitied.  
But people forget easily. They forget and move on, and along with that, their morality slowly fades. And you, you are left alone, hurting by a side of a bed, talking to what feels like the ghost of someone you once loved.  
Every time she went by his room, she also went in.  
His frame looked funny against the white sheets, like it didn't truly belong there. His broad shoulders always seemed too big for the bed in Amelia's mind, even if that wasn't necessarily true.  
But he just laid there.  
There was a tube going from his throat, breathing for him.  
She wished she could take that off, but she knew the consequences.  
There were perfusions on both his arms and she wanted them off as well, but she couldn't. She was a damn doctor, a surgeon, a neuroscientist and she should know better. _But she didn't_.  
Every time she came in the room, it felt even more horrible, more forced.  
At first she refused to talk to him.  
She knew people did that.  
Talking to a patient in a coma. She didn't want to do that because of two very strict reasons. One, because she doubted he could hear her. Second, because even of he could, maybe he didn't want to and it felt wrong to talk to him because he couldn't tell her to just _shut the hell up_.  
The night before day 3 she had a 7 hour surgery.  
A perfect storm.  
The night before that, she had stayed in the hospital for no reason at all.  
She felt dead inside, after everything was wrapped up, even if the patient had survived. So, when she went into Owen's room only to find him in the exact same position. She broke down.  
She called him an asshole for not waking up, and then she started hitting him.  
Then she started saying that she loved him.  
It probably was straight-up frightening to watch because the nurses had to call Pierce. _Cowards_ , Amelia had thought bitterly.  
It took Bailey, Maggie and Richard to calm her down and even then, she still felt empty and betrayed.  
How dared he be there, so close and yet so far away?!  
She had gone home after that, sent away by force rather than her own will. She had locked herself in the bedroom, not trusting herself enough to not go after drugs. She fell asleep within minutes.  
It was Alex who unlocked the door. He didn't ask questions. He didn't mention the incident. He just smiled politely at Amelia, as if nothing was wrong and asked if she could babysit the children the next day.  
Amelia knew he was trying to get her out of the hospital, away from _him_.  
She agreed.  
That day, she started talking to him.  
It was barely anything, a nice 'hello' and a 'how are you', but to Amelia it felt like a huge line had been crossed.  
It felt like she was drowning him in uselessness.  
The kids had been angels, truly incredibly nice little angels.  
Ellie had fallen asleep immediately in her arms, Zola had played with her dolls alone in a corner and Bailey was in his pjs without even a warning.  
By ten o'clock, they were all tucked in bed and sleeping soundly.  
It was as if they knew Amelia was at the end of her powers, as if they could _feel_ it. Even though in no world could they have actually done that.  
By the time Maggie got home, Amelia was watching some stupid black and white movie, her eyes unfocused and her brain on something else entirely.  
"Where are the kids?"  
The house looked perfectly clean, the kitchen not burnt and everything in place. For a house with three children it was nothing short of a miracle.  
"They're fine. They're sleeping." Amelia answered, without any sign that she was aware of the words coming out of her mouth.  
"Mer might just hire you as a permanent babysitter. Look at how clean everything is." It was a joke, at least in Maggie's mind, it was.  
Amelia, however, seemed to not care.  
"She might. But she doesn't want to. No one would want their children around Hurricane Amelia."  
There was silence then.

* * *

The fifth day went horribly slow.  
There were no surgeries to take Amelia's mind off things.  
So she went in Meredith's room, along with the kids.  
Those kids that had lost their father and were now separated from their mother.  
A hard breath from Meredith stole Amelia's attention completely.  
"Woah, easy there Bailey. Your mommy's tummy is really hurt." She said, taking the little boy off Meredith's stomach.  
"Why?"  
"Because your mommy has hurt herself." Amelia tried to explain, in as few words as she could.  
"Why?" The game continued, as Zola joined in.  
Amelia sighed lightly, inaudibly.  
"Because there was an accident."  
"But why?"  
"Now, that's enough, Bailey." Meredith tried, but Bailey wouldn't have it.  
He curled up to his mother's arm, hugging her. Amelia was surprised to see how careful he was to avoid the bandages this time.  
Zola immediately mimicked her little brother's movements, climbing on the other side of the bed.  
Amelia could feel her eyes tear up and she turned her head away from the scene.  
"I want you to come home, mommy." Zola said, her face buried deep in her mother's neck.  
"I know, Zozo. Just one more day, okay?"  
Amelia knew it was driving Meredith crazy to stay in a hospital bed instead of operating. It would've driven Amelia crazy as well.  
But it seemed everyone at the hospital was willing to keep Meredith in that bed for as long as they could. She had a history of being imprudent.  
Then again, all of them had.  
Her room seemed to be almost always full.  
Whether it was the kids or Karev. Or Maggie. Or Torres. Or Richard, Bailey. Kepner and Avery. Even Wilson came.  
Meredith had people. She had so many people there for her.  
When they would come, the whole room would brighten up so suddenly, like it was the 4th of July. People came into Owen's room as well.  
It was usually Callie or April to stay there and just talk to him.  
When someone was there, Amelia would never even want to enter. It was only the moments she was alone with him that she still had hope he would wake up.  
But with every passing hour, the hope was getting slipper and slimmer.  
"Amelia!"  
Meredith yelled at the only other adult in the room.  
"Yeah, what?" She asked, confused.  
Meredith sighed, mimicking to the two sleeping children.  
"I don't wanna wake them up. Do you think you could get them back to daycare later?"  
Amelia could only nod.  
"I don't even have anything planned for today." She said, forcing a smile.  
Meredith saw right through it.  
"He's gonna wake up."  
"Yeah, right."  
"He is." Meredith said, confidence exploding through her words.  
"Shouldn't you call Cristina, anyway?"  
There was a moment of absolute silence, so deep you needed a saw to cut through.  
When Meredith spoke again, Amelia felt her whole being shake.  
"I already did. She's on her way now. She'll probably be here by midnight."  
Amelia left the room soon after.

* * *

"Are you kidding me?"  
It wasn't a voice Amelia recognized, so she turned around.  
It was a _face_ Amelia recognized, although she couldn't tell from where at first. It was the look in her eyes that inevitably betrayed her.  
Cristina Yang.  
The Cristina Yang.  
The famous one, the one who left an imprint on every one of the people here. The one who should've won a Harper Avery.  
The legend.  
"Oh, hey." She then said, noticing Amelia. "Shepherd sister?" She asked.  
It was her air, Amelia thought. The air of superiority, of a coolness that betrayed her personality.  
"Yeah." She managed to say.  
She was more than just intimidating.  
"Which one?"  
Amelia clenched her jaw. She hated this question, or, more accurately, the answer to this question.  
"The smallest."  
"Hurricane Amelia." It was as if she was waiting to say that.  
"I'm gonna go, now."  
But Cristina was already looking at Owen, a softness on her face she hadn't seen before.  
She closed her eyes, feeling as if she was intruding and slipped out of the room unnoticed.  
Amelia had heard stories of Cristina Yang. Cristina Yang, the incredible heart surgeon, Meredith Grey's person.  
The love of Owen Hunt's life.  
She found the first janitor's closet and just hid.  
Hid from Cristina Yang.  
Hid from the life she had intruded upon.  
Hid from all the people who were marked by something she had never felt.  
Amelia had known this for a long time. It was only now that she admitted it to herself: _she didn't belong here_.

* * *

It must have been a few hours later when someone else walked straight into the closet.  
Cristina Yang held her breath as she leaned over a table.  
"Hey." Amelia said.  
She didn't want to talk to her, _hell_ , she didn't really want to see her.  
But what was the alternative, let her do whatever it was that she was doing until it was her who noticed Amelia?  
Nope, she still had dignity.  
"Oh, hi."  
There was awkwardness over the top. For a second, Amelia wondered whether she knew about her and Owen.  
Then again, what was there to know?  
"So... Owen crashed." She said it like it was a discussion topic. She said it like Amelia used to say things, as if they really didn't bother her even if she was terrified.  
"When?" It wasn't desperate. It wasn't rushed. It felt like the discussion was going on. As if they weren't talking about someone they knew.  
"A few minutes ago. He's stable now."  
Amelia nodded, trying to understand why. There was silence again, not a single sound breaking through the tension in the room.  
It was both hot and cold, it was dangerous.  
"This is the sixth day, isn't it?" Cristina broke it.  
Amelia could only nod.  
"I... I'm gonna go check on him."  
"You care about him." It was a statement, not a question.  
"He's my patient."  
But both women knew this wasn't true.

 **I figured it was only right to bring Cristina in, especially given the situation.**

 **Also, this chapter was a bit slow, sorry for that! Badass Amelia will be back next chapter!**


	6. Chapter 6

Amelia had seen Cristina more than a few times during the days that followed.  
In fact, she seemed to be everywhere. In Owen's room. At Meredith's house. In the cafeteria, even in the OR.  
Amelia wondered how many more surgeries till she had to do one with her.  
With her luck, she might as well just schedule it.  
It wasn't Cristina, not really. It was how badly she reminded Amelia she didn't belong here, with these people.  
She's never been one to cry over not feeling at home. Then again, she always seemed to take off when something was going wrong.  
 _Not this time, though._  
This time, she was going to fight for it.  
If she could, of course.  
Right now, the only other person in the whole hospital unaffected by Cristina's return was Maggie.  
But she was in surgery, leaving Amelia alone with her depressing thoughts. Since when had she become so melodramatic anyway?  
She used to be fun.

* * *

It was a while later that Amelia was paged for a consult. She figured it was a brain tumor in less than 2 minutes, which, to be fair, had to be some kind of record.  
The only problem was with how big the tumor was.  
It was literally borderline between operable and inoperable, and that was coming from _her_.  
She closed her eyes, after she saw the scans.  
There was a patient with a probably inoperable tumor sitting in front of her, that was the _logical_ point of view.  
But she was hardly ever logical and rational.  
And the patient was a ten year old boy with a smile so big, it broke her heart every time she saw it.  
"Alright." She started, as she made her way into the room. The two parents turned their heads as soon as they heard her voice.  
The mother spoke before Amelia could say anything more:  
"It's an inoperable tumor. I know, we've been told that. But we've also read about the miracles you've preformed." Her voice was breaking slightly. "Dr. Shepherd, you are our last chance."  
Amelia was already willing to do the surgery, but now... Now she knew she had to do it as quick and as perfect as she could.  
She nodded, before speaking herself.  
"I'm going to do the surgery. Today, actually. But I need you to know all the possible consequences."  
The father spoke this time:  
"We know them all. Permanent loss of eye sight. Loss of functioning in legs or arms... Death. We've heard them."  
It hurt her tremendously to hear those two people know the possibilities of how an operation could go wrong by heart.  
But they weren't the first, and everyone knew they wouldn't be the last.  
The little boy's tumor was quite like Herman's in both size and position, which eased the operation, slightly.  
But it also meant the surgery was going to be a damn difficult one.

* * *

"Amelia, you're exposing yourself again."  
This time, she didn't waste time using the second pair of gloves. She was doing it better, quicker that way.  
"I'll be done faster this way."  
"You're not doing anyone a favor." Edwards was insisting, which was pissing Amelia off.  
"Edwards. In my OR and you agree to my methods or out."  
The resident stayed without further complaints. Still, Amelia could feel her eyes on her.  
She herself felt slightly wary about the situation, as well. After all, a few glasses weren't what made a person drunk. It was a few bottles.  
The tumor was harder to get than she had expected.  
Deeper, closer to everything vital.  
One wrong move and everything could go to hell. On the other hand, moving too slow meant endangering both her and the boy on the table.  
She breathed in, trying to regain her focus.  
She had done this once before, and she had managed just fine. The only thing was, she couldn't let a little kid sightless. Nor could she let him without function in his legs or arms.  
He had his whole life ahead of him, had yet to make any mistake.  
 _So why, just why did the universe found it amusing to torture him like that?_  
Put an almost inoperable tumor in that innocent brain of his.  
 _Sure, do that_. What could possibly be wrong about that?  
"Doctor Shepherd!"  
"Yes!"  
Amelia stopped, brought back by Edwards's distressed voice.  
"You haven't moved in two minutes. Time is running out." The resident informed her.  
Time _was_ running out, it had been too long for her to be exposed to radiation.  
 _Now or never,_ she thought. Either she gave this kid a life, or she took it from him.

* * *

Her whole body felt numb to the outside world.  
She could feel sweat dripping off her face, could see the tears falling in the sink. She didn't dare to look up in the mirror.  
She already knew what she would find: a broken person. A red face from the effort. Puffy eyes from the crying. An empty look from the sadness she was trying to conceal.  
Amelia was at least grateful there was no one else in the room.  
Maybe she could just disappear, like a teardrop down the sink. Go low, low, _lower_ until you got mixed with everything else and no one could guess your contour any longer.  
Or maybe, she could go even lower than that. Just reach for the very bottom, dug herself a hole and then, stay there.  
It sounded so simple, so perfectly peaceful.  
So much better than having to walk out of that safe room, into the hallways, parading your failure. Pretending you didn't just murder a ten year old. Sure, it was a scalpel, and sure she had lost many patients before but...  
But he was just so much like how she had imagined her baby.  
Someone walked in the bathroom, but Amelia didn't bother to look up. She had no interest whatsoever to give this hospital another reason for gossip.  
But what she heard, instead, stopped her heart.  
"He's awake."  
 _Two words._  
Two words and her heart wasn't working anymore, neither were her lungs nor her brain.  
She wasn't Amelia Shepherd anymore. She was just death.  
And then, she was more alive than she had ever been in her entire life. And she was running frantically, slipping with every turn she took and bumping into people more often than not.  
But she couldn't find it in herself to care.  
She was mad, utterly crazy.  
 _And she was in love._  
As soon as she saw his room, she suddenly slowed down.  
It wasn't only her legs, it was her whole body. Suddenly, her brain was working again, screaming at her for imagining she had any right to burst in.  
And just as suddenly, she could breath again, though hard. She sounded as if she was suffocating.  
 _Maybe she was._  
Still, she dared to look into his room again, trying her hardest not to be noticed.  
She wasn't.  
Instead, she saw Cristina sitting right next to him, both laughing like old friends. His laugh echoed in her ears, such a beautiful noise that she had missed so terribly much.  
For a second, she considered turning around and just leaving them be. That's when she felt someone else's presence next to her. A moment later, Amelia was basically thrown into the room by Meredith, forced to meet his eyes as he looked up.  
And he looked at her.  
It made her feel as if she was floating through the air, as if she was some stupid teenager.  
Oh, and those eyes.  
She hadn't seen those eyes in so long, the blue to them.  
The gray.  
There was something else in them, but she couldn't quite pinpoint it.  
But it didn't matter.  
He was looking at her, with life radiating through him and for a moment, everything else had disappeared.  
" _Amelia_." His voice was slightly rasped, although she guessed it couldn't have been any other way.  
At the sound of her own name, she made a few tentative steps.  
"Hey." She greeted him, as if they were only two colleagues who hadn't seen each other in a few days.  
He chuckled, making her heart tighten in her chest.  
 _What was it about him that drove her completely insane?_  
"I think I'm gonna go." Cristina suddenly said, already getting up.  
Her figure was perfectly composed, though Amelia guessed she always looked like that.  
"Go out of here, or back to Switzerland?" Owen asked her, his voice staying neutral.  
"Both." She answered, before throwing him a smile.  
Amelia tried to find one other time she had seem her smile, but failed to.  
Owen only nodded, as he watched Cristina walk away.  
It wasn't until she was out of sight that Amelia dared to move closer to him.  
"She's quite something." She tried to joke.  
She watched as Owen raised his eyebrows, while laughing lightly. "That's an... understatement."  
And then, he looked at her, truly took her in, like he had done only minutes before.  
"Are you jealous?" He asked her, suddenly, a shy smirk playing on his lips.  
"What?" Amelia tried to laugh it off.

When she was six, her mother had tried to make her take up acting courses. She regretted not listening to her at that moment.  
"Amelia, I have spent my last few days in a comma. I'm not big on wasting time right now." When she didn't say anything, he went on, trying to lighten the mood. "Although it would probably pass in a few weeks."  
"And if I was jealous?" She bursted. "Would that make me pathetic or just bipolar in your eyes?" She spoke bitterly, but didn't wait for the reply.  
Instead, she took off, for whatever reason searching for Cristina Yang.

* * *

"You know he loves you."  
Amelia had found Cristina in the parking lot, chatting with Meredith while she waited for a cab. It was Cristina who had asked Meredith to give her and Amelia a moment to talk, to both the other's surprise. And now she was talking to her.  
Her sentences were spoken as if they were undeniable facts, although Amelia could enumerate a thousand motives of why this one at least surely wasn't.  
"I doubt-" Amelia tried, but she was cut off.  
"Don't. He does."  
For a second, there was silence. In the parking lot of a busy hospital, there was silence.  
And then, there was a horn that broke the peacefulness and with that, Cristina Yang was off, like a hurricane that had hit a town and then disappeared.

* * *

 **I'm gonna have to cut this story short and stop here. I truly thought I could write a multichapter while balancing everything else that I'm doing, but turns out, I can't.**

 **I'm truly sorry, and I hope you find it it yourself to forgive me.**

 **As a person who also reads fanfics, I know how horrible it is for a story to end sooner than planned.**

 **So, I'm really, really sorry.**


End file.
